Today is the four year anniversary of my father’s death. Unlike birthdays or wedding anniversaries, this anniversary is not fun to celebrate–I am not planning a big party with cute little details. Instead, I am cacooned at home waiting for the next few days to pass. Friday is also his birthday, so this little stretch of May can be rough.
image by Melanie Mauer
For those who know me well, you know that I am my father’s daughter. We were incredibly close and I saw him or talked to him almost every day.
His death is not something that I’ve shared before on bluegrass threads, despite his passing just 6 weeks after the site’s launch. This was a project that he was very proud of and one that helped to carry me through some dark days by focusing on the beauty of the world and the home that I love.
As a way to reflect on the positives today, I thought I’d share some of the best things about my dad, a man who shaped my life in every way.
image by Melanie Mauer
He had the greatest smile.
Anyone that knew Dad will tell you about his friendly face. He was often overly chatty and friendly (to my embarrassment) with strangers, but that smile of his was just the best.
He was incredibly generous and giving.
Dad regularly bought all of the homeless downtown Starbucks coffee (his favorite). He volunteered and worked behind the scenes at every church and every non-profit organization that my mother worked for and he never expected anything in return. He made many personal sacrifices for my brother and I to have dance and music lessons without complaint.
He could make the best sound effects.
Actually, he only had one sound effect and he used it for everything. Tap dancing? Check. Grinding a pepper mill? Check. Horses running? Check. No one else could make “the sound” in our family—-that was until my son started doing it at 2 years old. We all love to hear Gabriel make that infamous sound.
Dad loved to laugh and he loved to tell stories. Somehow this one sound effect always made an appearance.
He told me that I could do anything.
You go, girl. You can do it. Go get ’em, Kak. I am so lucky that he encouraged me in all things.
He loved my mother deeply.
I have an amazing model for relationships. My parents were high school sweethearts and best friends. After more than 30 years together, they still stared at each other across a crowded room. They still went on dates. They were so inspiring to watch.
He was always up for something fun and spontaneous.
Dad was always game to get dessert (and eat it first, of course), go to a movie, go on a weekend getaway, make a pitstop at a candy store, play a round of golf, drive an hour to get a LaRosa’s pizza or go to see a concert. His spontaneity and impulsiveness made him fun.
I know that I could go on and on about my Dad. He was simply the best and I miss him so much.